Sunday, September 26, 2010

As The Day Blossoms Into Night

People always ask me, "Ulas, where do you get your figure, you should show me how to be fit" I say to them "I do laps around the bar. don"t you?"

Scott says i have Mick Jaggers singing voice, if you imitate something for a long time you could pick it up too. It's like that girl back two thousand years ago, she probably heard her mother getting railed by a sack of drunken douche after a night at town central, yelling OH GOD! , and she assumed hey i guess that's what you're supposed to say when you're getting coined.

unfortunately 2000 years later we still have to live it, the annoyance of a girl moaning "OH GOD" repeatedly, as if to say..." "

I'm more of a fan of moaners. at least you know they are really trying to break the wave.

I'm pretty sure around the same time boys discover masturbation, girls pick up the "oh god" routine.

I guess it beats a girl staring blank in your face for the first 2 minutes of sex. Maybe girls can pick up a new routine, for the first 2 minutes of sex just read a book or something, or tell dirty stories. eventually when you get comfortable enough take it to a kitchen and prepare an after snack while the magic really isn't happening .

I'd like to be a fan of the bathroom encounters, its not really an area of expertise but i can imagine getting a lot of other peoples piss on your things.


EDIT: imagine a girl staring at you with no reaction, that'll really boost confidence

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